Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
