so explain again why im purple
no
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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