Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
