wat bout pragnant strippers??
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
