someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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