Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
