I bet he comes in French.
we made out on top of his cat.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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