this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
