Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
