Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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