And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I just had sex on a roof
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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