I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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