How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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