Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I wish you could order shots online.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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