So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
