she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Randomize
