He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
