I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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