im drinking this country out of the recession.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
high people should be assigned attendants
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
