Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
