if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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