I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize