I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
