she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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