Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
