just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
