Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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