HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
ugly people sure do ruin things
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
