Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
