As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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