You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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