What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
