..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize