I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
