Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
