Whod you bang
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize