So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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