what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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