Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
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