The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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