i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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