I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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