FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
worst night to have a conscience
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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