You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
