His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
