the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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