Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
