420 ftw
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
