Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
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