For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
